HUH! You didn't think I was alive, did ya?! ...well...me neither.

or: How I turned into a Fembot 
or: Don't stop, can't stop

Actually I didn't think I'd ever start blogging again. Of course I've had phases when i thought about giving up blogging before just because I thoughtI was wastin my energy because no one ever read this blog anyways. This time was a little different. The whole story began, when the last semester started. I took a lot of courses and started a part time job in order to save up money to go Japan. The first few weeks it all worked out quite well. I was busy, but busy in a okay-kinda way. A that time the only reason I didn't blog was because I didn't have a lot of time and didn't feel like it. But things changed. Around the middle of the semester I really went into a deep crisis. I felt like breaking down from stress everyday, day by day it became harder for me to deal with people (i just wanted to be on my own), i couldn't sleep at all and i felt like crying all the time. I woke up in the mornings and went to university, then i studied, then i worked, then I went to bed and fell asleep after 3 or 4 hours. Everyday the same. I turned into a robot...well a depressed robot that is. I even vanished almost completly from all social network sites, which is really abnormal for me. Turned out my thyroid gland (or the 3% that are left of it) decided to give me a hard time again. It really turned into a freak show. I think I hurt and worried a lot of people, and I'm really sorry for that. I found it quite scary myself.  Thanks to my parents I somehow managed to cope with the stress, the insomnia and finish the semester (even with very good grades - woot). The semester has been over for a few weeks now, but I kind of needed some time to recharge. I basially did nothing but watching movies and dramas, listening to music and reading books. I'm still not perfectly okay (propbably the hormones are still a little..not the optimum xD), sometimes I still feel horrible and most nights I can't go to sleep easily.  But I'm starting to feel alive again. I feel like going out, talking to people and well.... i feel like blogging. Because even though it's a waste of time: I love it. So here I am.


Some news about my life for you:

• A cat that doesn't really belong to us but has been eating at our house in my hometown had babies. In our basement. THEY ARE FRIGGIN ADORABLE. 

super cute little grey cat and horrible bare-faced me xD

Uschi (the creepy stalker cat) and her babiiies ^^

my favourite <3

• I'm going to Canada in September with my family. wooooot.
• My best friend from Japan is visiting me in the end of September. Oh yeah :D
• I FINALLY bought white dr. martens and white monster beats hd solo. thank you, part time job! xD

that's it for today!